One moment she's clearly enjoying your company, and the next she's telling you she isn't sure if you'll be good together.
Dating women who play hard to get can be fun and exciting. If you like the chase, you can take her coy behavior and teasing remarks as a challenge. It makes the moment you finally get her to say yes even sweeter.
But it can also be frustrating, especially if it has gone on long enough. You'll start to doubt if pursuing her is even worth it. Won't you just be wasting your time and energy?
Maybe, or maybe not. It all depends on exactly what game the woman you're after is playing.
What Does It Mean?
In a poll conducted by market research firm IPSOS, 39% of Americans said it takes about three months of dating before two people can discuss an exclusive relationship.
However, this timeframe may not be possible with women playing hard to get.
By definition, people who play hard to get pretend they don't like someone back to make that person more interested and determined to win their favor. They believe it makes them more attractive than if they reciprocate right away.
This can make dating full of thrill and mystery. But if you don't know why a woman is acting this way, it can make your efforts seem futile.
Signs She's Playing Hard to Get
It won't always be obvious that a woman is trying to make you chase her.
Sometimes, what she's saying won't match her behavior, causing a lot of mixed signals that can be very confusing. If that's the case, you'll need to look at her body language and judge her actions based on deeper context.
She never initiates and always keeps you waiting.
It's a common belief that men will make the first move.
But a woman can take advantage of this mindset when she plays hard to get. She'll wait for you to message first and often take a long time to respond. She won't outright reject your offers to hang out, but she'll go back and forth before making a final decision.
At times, it feels like she has you on a leash. But at the end of the day, she'll still give you her attention and choose to spend time with you.
She enjoys making you jealous.
Women who play hard to get also like it when you look visibly upset about the idea of other men taking an interest in her.
She often talks about her exes and other suitors to get a reaction from you. If you don't take the bait, she'll usually be bothered and give you more things to be jealous of.
But if you bite, she'll look pleased and either egg you on or subtly reassure you that you have nothing to be worried about.

It takes a lot of patience and understanding to be with women playing hard to get.
She's constantly testing you.
If a woman always gives you tests and asks you to prove your feelings, then chances are she's trying to see how serious you are about her.
These tests can range from making you miss a night's sleep in order to drive her somewhere or hinting at food cravings she wants you to buy for her. She can also ask you questions about why you like her and maybe even grill you for details about how she's better than all of your exes combined.
She becomes more interested when you start to pull away.
A game usually has at least two players, which means you can also try some things to see how the woman you're courting reacts.
If you slowly pull away and decrease your level of attention, she will most likely change tactics and begin overtly showing you her interest. Since she likes you back, she won't risk frustrating you to the point that you quit altogether.
Is She Playing Hard to Get or Not Interested in You?
A woman who doesn't like you will often be direct about it.
Even if she doesn't want to hurt you, her response will leave no room for interpretation. She'll be consistent about being unavailable. She won't ask you about your feelings. She might even give you names of other women you can court instead.
But those who play hard to get will give you just enough hint of their interest before stepping back to see if you move closer. There's a push-and-pull quality to your interactions.
When you're with a lady, the signs she's playing hard to get but likes you are centered on her lack of a firm rejection and obvious pleasure when you give her the attention and care she secretly wants.
Why Do Women Play Hard to Get?
A paper published in the European Journal of Personality found that the two major reasons people play hard to get are to make someone want them more and to test that person's level of interest and commitment.
So the next time you ask yourself, "Why is she playing hard to get if she actually likes me back?", you'll understand that her motivations often fall under these possibilities:

Sometimes, she plays hard to get to make sure she finds a man who deserves her.
She wants you to chase her harder.
For a woman who enjoys being pursued, giving up the game and immediately telling you she likes you back can be very boring.
She also gets validation from your efforts. In the best-case scenario, you'll have an unspoken understanding of your feelings and there's no emotional manipulation involved. It's simply a matter of testing your chemistry and compatibility as she directs your dating journey while you trail after her, charmed despite yourself.
She wants to be sure of your intentions.
Another reason why she plays hard to get is that she wants to make sure your feelings are sincere.
Maybe she was hurt by someone else before. Maybe she's just avoiding heartbreak. Either way, testing your resolve and waiting for proof of your love can be her way of checking whether or not you really are a good partner to have.
What to Do When She's Playing Hard to Get
After seeing the signs and knowing the reasons why she's playing hard to get, it's now up to you what you want to do.
If this kind of dynamic is not your cup of tea, then you don't have to force yourself. Not all women play hard to get, so you can always look for someone who will be straightforward about her feelings without making you jump through hoops.
But if your interest is piqued, then you can take the challenge. Look up questions to ask a girl playing hard to get, like what she wants in a man and what can make her say yes to a relationship. If you're lucky, she can list down things that describe you and indirectly tell you that you're on the right track.
You also don't have to give in to her every demand. After all, no one likes a pushover. Instead, give as good as you get and make her meet you halfway.
If you both play your cards right, there's an intense and passionate relationship waiting at the end of this game you'll sign up for.
References
Jonason, Peter Karl, and Normal P. Li. n.d. “Playing Hard–To–Get: Manipulating One's Perceived Availability as A Mate.” European Journal of Personality 27 (5).
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/264223276_Playing_Hard-To-Get_Manipulating_One'S_Perceived_Availability_as_A_Mate
Lee, Esther. 2020. “This Is How Long Couples Typically Wait Before Becoming Exclusive.” Yahoo.
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/long-couples-typically-wait-becoming-161722077.html